Sunday, September 30, 2007
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
OUCH!!!!
It has been fun reading all of your responses to the growing pains that little Ezra has been going through. It is hard to find our way in this world at times. I read an interesting article today that is not quite the same kind of thing, but that caught my attention; not to mention it made me think about different kinds of pain we go through for our kids. Here is the link for your reading pleasure...
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20995289/wid/11915773?GT1=10412
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20995289/wid/11915773?GT1=10412
The real answer
The real answer is to listen to the "still small voice." Raising children is such an incredibly difficult job that no one can do it successfully without the Spirit. We are so blessed to have the gift of the Holy Ghost to guide us.
Personally, I made so many mistakes that perhaps you can learn from them.
Remember that the most powerful teaching tool you have is your own personal example. If I could do it over again, I would try very hard to make the following words the ones to live by: Kind, Loving, Gentle, Fun-Loving, Firm, Caring, Persistent... etc. Words I would eliminate are: Angry, Mean, Severe, Ignoring, Mocking.
Don't forget, you will make mistakes but children are very resilient and will bounce back. Keep trying to do it right and the right will out-weigh the mistakes.
To all my children: I am sorry for all the many mistakes I made in raising you. The example that was provided for me by my father was not the greatest (of course that is no excuse). But, it is amazing how many times I found myself reflecting him in what I did. Now that Mom and I are alone, I often think of instances where, if I could do it again, I would do it differently.
Brad, let love be your guide. If you care, Ezra and your other children will turn out great! In fact, I can see that they are already well on the way.
On a side note... as the Dad, you have a minor role in shaping your children. The Mom is the biggest influence. In my case, I had the best "Mom" in the world raising my children. Just look at how great they turned out. You have Keryn. You can't lose!
Love, Dad
Personally, I made so many mistakes that perhaps you can learn from them.
Remember that the most powerful teaching tool you have is your own personal example. If I could do it over again, I would try very hard to make the following words the ones to live by: Kind, Loving, Gentle, Fun-Loving, Firm, Caring, Persistent... etc. Words I would eliminate are: Angry, Mean, Severe, Ignoring, Mocking.
Don't forget, you will make mistakes but children are very resilient and will bounce back. Keep trying to do it right and the right will out-weigh the mistakes.
To all my children: I am sorry for all the many mistakes I made in raising you. The example that was provided for me by my father was not the greatest (of course that is no excuse). But, it is amazing how many times I found myself reflecting him in what I did. Now that Mom and I are alone, I often think of instances where, if I could do it again, I would do it differently.
Brad, let love be your guide. If you care, Ezra and your other children will turn out great! In fact, I can see that they are already well on the way.
On a side note... as the Dad, you have a minor role in shaping your children. The Mom is the biggest influence. In my case, I had the best "Mom" in the world raising my children. Just look at how great they turned out. You have Keryn. You can't lose!
Love, Dad
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Parenting
I have never had 7-8 weeks to prepare for a talk before and hopefully, it won't happen that way again! It is nice to have it behind us. I know I didn't give a better talk with an extra 6 weeks to prepare. I spoke with last week's speaker and she has 6 weeks and still did it the night before!
Well, Brad, parenting is an adventure and you aren't always sure you have taken the right road, but with prayerful decisions it will usually come out with a good product, a functioning member of society and someone with a strong testimony of the gospel. We can't protect our children from the world through childhood, then expect them to deal with life as adults or teenagers. There are steps that must be taken by children as they experience the negative things of life with the tiny issues so that when big ones arise, they have the tools to respond appropriately. You have discovered that bullying starts very young. It is a huge issue in schools. An explanation that the behavior isn't proper in your home and a time out (brief) to reinforce the concept will have him well on his way with what is expected of him in spite of what he sees elsewhere. Once won't do it, but hang in there, he will get it. It is all these little issues that build character and shape the individual. The fine line is to know when too much exposure isn't good. It is good for our children to be good role models for others as long as they are staying afloat. There are lots of parents out there with poor parenting skills. these are the ones you don't want watching your children but have the friend in your home (if necessary) where you have control and can set the rules of what happens in your home. Be consistent!
I know I made tons of mistakes with each of my children and I am not much of an expert, but I believe the Lord makes up for your shortcomings if you are trying to do what is right. There are no perfect parents out there, so relax!
You two are doing great, keep up the good work, it is a long, rocky road with lots of highs and lows, but worth it! I have awesome grandchildren!
Mom
Well, Brad, parenting is an adventure and you aren't always sure you have taken the right road, but with prayerful decisions it will usually come out with a good product, a functioning member of society and someone with a strong testimony of the gospel. We can't protect our children from the world through childhood, then expect them to deal with life as adults or teenagers. There are steps that must be taken by children as they experience the negative things of life with the tiny issues so that when big ones arise, they have the tools to respond appropriately. You have discovered that bullying starts very young. It is a huge issue in schools. An explanation that the behavior isn't proper in your home and a time out (brief) to reinforce the concept will have him well on his way with what is expected of him in spite of what he sees elsewhere. Once won't do it, but hang in there, he will get it. It is all these little issues that build character and shape the individual. The fine line is to know when too much exposure isn't good. It is good for our children to be good role models for others as long as they are staying afloat. There are lots of parents out there with poor parenting skills. these are the ones you don't want watching your children but have the friend in your home (if necessary) where you have control and can set the rules of what happens in your home. Be consistent!
I know I made tons of mistakes with each of my children and I am not much of an expert, but I believe the Lord makes up for your shortcomings if you are trying to do what is right. There are no perfect parents out there, so relax!
You two are doing great, keep up the good work, it is a long, rocky road with lots of highs and lows, but worth it! I have awesome grandchildren!
Mom
Friday, September 21, 2007
Michelle and Moroni, together again
Happy birthday, Michelle. And happy Angel Moroni day to the rest of you.
Dad, I'm in suspense! Thanks for the response, Kim. I'll look forward to any others you all have to share.
While talking to Dad on the phone, he clarified the answer to my question in a post below. It was his dad's mom that played the piano for the silent movies. I also got him to tell me a bit more about his own dad's musical life. It was fun to hear a bit about it. We're going to have to sit mom and dad down and do some video interviews pretty soon. It is so fun to hear about their lives before we were around.
Dad, I'm in suspense! Thanks for the response, Kim. I'll look forward to any others you all have to share.
While talking to Dad on the phone, he clarified the answer to my question in a post below. It was his dad's mom that played the piano for the silent movies. I also got him to tell me a bit more about his own dad's musical life. It was fun to hear a bit about it. We're going to have to sit mom and dad down and do some video interviews pretty soon. It is so fun to hear about their lives before we were around.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Our famous Lauren
These photos were posted on the Deseret News website and one was even on the front of the sports page! Check 'em out.
Look at 8/24 12/24 16/24 17/24
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Welcome to parenthood
Never avoid any opportunity for growth! The Lord sends young men on missions, sometimes to dangerous places, and gives them experiences we, as protective parents, would never let them have. He wants us to be IN the world. To live and experience and learn and grow. And hopefully to be shining examples of righteous choices.
Steve and I have struggled with what to limit and what to learn from... They will go out into the world and experience temptations eventually. Start now, yes age 2+, to let them be "tempted" while you are still there to guide and help them recognize the consequences of those "temptations". In this case if he is rude/bossy/mean, he will be unhappy with the consequences and not be able to play happily with those he chooses to bully. Ezra will learn that he has to choose how HE will act, even when others around him are acting differently. What a life lesson! We always told our kids... others have their agency, but we (our family) choose differently and we are happier for those choices.
It is so great when you see your kids recognizing for themselves what they want to do and the reasons they want to do them. (Not just doing things because Mom or Dad is there hovering and threatening.)
GO BRAD!
Steve and I have struggled with what to limit and what to learn from... They will go out into the world and experience temptations eventually. Start now, yes age 2+, to let them be "tempted" while you are still there to guide and help them recognize the consequences of those "temptations". In this case if he is rude/bossy/mean, he will be unhappy with the consequences and not be able to play happily with those he chooses to bully. Ezra will learn that he has to choose how HE will act, even when others around him are acting differently. What a life lesson! We always told our kids... others have their agency, but we (our family) choose differently and we are happier for those choices.
It is so great when you see your kids recognizing for themselves what they want to do and the reasons they want to do them. (Not just doing things because Mom or Dad is there hovering and threatening.)
GO BRAD!
The Answer... soon
Of course, I know the right answer. However, if I simply give it to you before your other family members have had a turn, it would stifle their initiative. So, after all others have responded, I'll tell you.
Love Dad
Love Dad
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Dear Abby
I need some advice, and since Abby is dead, the rest of you will have to fill in. We're not too far into this parenting gig, so any thoughts you have are welcome from your various stages of life, from no children to grandchildren.
Ezra is absorbing behaviors like a sponge. He loves to put on a white shirt on Sunday "just like Daddy!" Sometimes, we don't really like the behaviors that he picks up. He has a fairly small Sunbeam class and the other boy in his class lives around the corner from us and his mother brings him to the weekly playgroup the women in the ward do.
This little boy has two very timid parents (from our very uninformed and distant view) and he has become quite strong willed and bossy. He's starting to manifest some bossy/pushy/bully behavior. After Ezra is around this boy, he starts to show those sorts of behaviors too.
Keryn said, "If this is the worst influence Ezra is ever around, we'll be amazingly blessed." Good point. But still you wonder... do you try to avoid the kid when you can, or do you try to deal with the fallout of Ezra mimicking the behavior?
Help me, Abby!
Ezra is absorbing behaviors like a sponge. He loves to put on a white shirt on Sunday "just like Daddy!" Sometimes, we don't really like the behaviors that he picks up. He has a fairly small Sunbeam class and the other boy in his class lives around the corner from us and his mother brings him to the weekly playgroup the women in the ward do.
This little boy has two very timid parents (from our very uninformed and distant view) and he has become quite strong willed and bossy. He's starting to manifest some bossy/pushy/bully behavior. After Ezra is around this boy, he starts to show those sorts of behaviors too.
Keryn said, "If this is the worst influence Ezra is ever around, we'll be amazingly blessed." Good point. But still you wonder... do you try to avoid the kid when you can, or do you try to deal with the fallout of Ezra mimicking the behavior?
Help me, Abby!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
BIG Ty
As all of you parents are realizing... time flies! It was so weird watching my little Ty on the high school football field playing like a big boy. All those kids seem so old, and I am certainly not old enough to have a child that "big". As Lauren and I wade through ACT registrations, college admission requirements, and scholarship possibilities, I am starting to think maybe I am old enough. I guess what I am saying is... enjoy every moment! Your kids will soon be BIG kids too!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Love You Mom!
I hope you have a terrific birthday today.
Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. (Prov. 4:7)
Monday, September 10, 2007
Boo! Hiss! Cheer!
Our stake is putting on a melodrama. The woman putting the whole thing together was apparently getting desperate to find a pianist after being turned down several times--so she called me.
I explained that I could play sheet music but that I'm not much of an improviser. Knowing that I was going to be at the home of a really great pianist in a couple of days (in our old Orem ward), I agreed to do it, or at least to find some music if I could.
I turned to the internet and, without too much trouble, found some old music originally composed for use by the piano players that accompanied silent movies. There was "sailor music" and "hurry music" and "funeral music" and "battle music." The pieces weren't very hard to play and I had a great time at the rehearsal bouncing through the pieces and the actors really enjoyed having some sound effects. So I guess I have the gig. We perform in about two weeks.
Wasn't it Dad's grandma that played the piano for the silent movies? Which one?
I explained that I could play sheet music but that I'm not much of an improviser. Knowing that I was going to be at the home of a really great pianist in a couple of days (in our old Orem ward), I agreed to do it, or at least to find some music if I could.
I turned to the internet and, without too much trouble, found some old music originally composed for use by the piano players that accompanied silent movies. There was "sailor music" and "hurry music" and "funeral music" and "battle music." The pieces weren't very hard to play and I had a great time at the rehearsal bouncing through the pieces and the actors really enjoyed having some sound effects. So I guess I have the gig. We perform in about two weeks.
Wasn't it Dad's grandma that played the piano for the silent movies? Which one?
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Happy Grandparents' Day!
According to my wall calendar, it's Grandparents' Day today. So, happy Grandparents' Day, George and Eva!
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Shifting Views on Education?
I just read, in the online magazine Slate, a fascinating article about teachers and the slowly changing perception the public has about them:
High-pressured and punishing—of such macho qualities is social cachet often built in the world of work. Nowhere in Tyler Heights or Stuyvesant, in Perlstein's and Klein's portrayals, do you hear anyone touting the familiar (female- and family-friendly) perks of the profession: the long summer months off, the seasonal breaks, the 3 o'clock dismissals, the heartwarming kids. Teachers' unions never get mentioned, nor do bonuses. The scene is more reminiscent of, say, the Union army, beset by struggles and squabbles within the ranks, yet striving to make slow headway on divisive home ground.Read the whole thing--it's fascinating, and indicates that the exhausting, draining, but hopefully rewarding reality of teaching may actually start getting a little respect in the world.
It is precisely the draining rigors of the job that are intrinsic to teaching's appeal, helping it shed its schoolmarmish taint, suggests Fortune in an article about TFA's popularity. "The program has been likened to a domestic Peace Corps, with long work hours and much emotional demand, so it's not for the faint of heart."
Monday, August 27, 2007
Vball Girl
We are so PROUD of our little Lauren!
She has gone from being a little freshman who rode the bench to being Varsity Captain, and is the only starter on her team that plays all the way around. (Most players specialize and play only front or back row. They sub in and out throughout the rotation.) She is enjoying being the leader and is doing a great job. Her team is ranked #1 in their region. Here's a clip of the opening tournament.
She has gone from being a little freshman who rode the bench to being Varsity Captain, and is the only starter on her team that plays all the way around. (Most players specialize and play only front or back row. They sub in and out throughout the rotation.) She is enjoying being the leader and is doing a great job. Her team is ranked #1 in their region. Here's a clip of the opening tournament.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Quick Chocolate Chip Cookies: A Good Thing?
On my Google homepage, I have a "recipe of the day" from Betty Crocker. One from this week was "Quick Chocolate Chip Cookies." I haven't tried to make them yet, but you use Bisquick to cut down on the number of ingredients you have to measure out. This could be a very bad thing! :) Do you guys have any favorite treat recipes that are quick and easy?
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Gid kid's tests
Gideon had some tests at the children's hospital today.
He passed with two A's and a B.
No, just kidding. Every time I say something about his "tests" that's what I think of, though.
But he did pass. His bladder study test was very satisfactory--he's not having bladder spasms or over-full high-pressure problems. This is good because it means there is much less chance for kidney infections and other high-risk problems. We don't have to go in for this test again for twelve months--yay!
His renal (kidney) ultrasound was also fine. Apparently his kidneys are a bit on the small size, but not anything to worry about. But everything is growing fine and healthy and looks just like it should. Another yay!
In a lot of ways, what I think of as his main disability--the potential that he won't walk--doesn't actually impact his quality of life. It's the "little" things--like kidney problems--that can cause much bigger problems. So I'm very very grateful that he is getting such a great start in life!
And now I'm exhausted, and must go to bed. It's an awfully long drive up to Primary's, and coming back during rush hour is no picnic, especially with tired, cranky kids in the back. (Thank you so much, Grandma and Grandpa Ross, for watching the older two for me! It sure made my day about 1000 times easier, and they sure had a lot more fun with you than they would have with me!)
He passed with two A's and a B.
No, just kidding. Every time I say something about his "tests" that's what I think of, though.
But he did pass. His bladder study test was very satisfactory--he's not having bladder spasms or over-full high-pressure problems. This is good because it means there is much less chance for kidney infections and other high-risk problems. We don't have to go in for this test again for twelve months--yay!
His renal (kidney) ultrasound was also fine. Apparently his kidneys are a bit on the small size, but not anything to worry about. But everything is growing fine and healthy and looks just like it should. Another yay!
In a lot of ways, what I think of as his main disability--the potential that he won't walk--doesn't actually impact his quality of life. It's the "little" things--like kidney problems--that can cause much bigger problems. So I'm very very grateful that he is getting such a great start in life!
And now I'm exhausted, and must go to bed. It's an awfully long drive up to Primary's, and coming back during rush hour is no picnic, especially with tired, cranky kids in the back. (Thank you so much, Grandma and Grandpa Ross, for watching the older two for me! It sure made my day about 1000 times easier, and they sure had a lot more fun with you than they would have with me!)
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
An Invitation
I would like to formally invite all of you to Durango this October. As you may know, Elise will be turning 8 this year. Her birthday is on Oct. 19th and this year it falls on a Friday. In keeping with our tradition, we are going to baptize her on this day. She is very excited and hopes to see some if not all of her cousins there! :) I would like to have a musical number from the extended family...Picture with me if you will...Nic on piano, Kim on violin, Deb coming in on trumpet, softly at first, then building..no wait, I guess, just softly...cousins singing in a mini-vienna-boy-choir-style-thingy. Of course Lauren, Claire, and Mercy can sing too!! Hee Hee Let me know if any of you can make it!!
Also... We will be coming to SLC for Turkey Day!
Also... We will be coming to SLC for Turkey Day!
Monday, August 20, 2007
Happy Birthday, Debbie!
I hope you had a fabulous birthday yesterday. I think it is important to remember that Adolf Hitler was elected president of Germany on your birthday, but the world tried to balance that out by having both you and Gene Roddenberry born on the same day. (Well, not the same day, per se, but you get the idea.)
In design news, in anticipatory celebration of your birthday, Ford stopped production on the Model T on your birthday. I guess it just didn't come in enough colors.
In design news, in anticipatory celebration of your birthday, Ford stopped production on the Model T on your birthday. I guess it just didn't come in enough colors.
congratulations!
We received a call Sunday morning from a friend in Page. Our first reaction was that we were getting the scoop on who the new stake president was going to be. It was actually something more important. He told us that Nicole had given the best talk in the evening session of stake conference. Way to go Nicole!
Mom
Mom
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Milestone
Today I dropped off all four of our children at school for the first time! Drake is embarking on his final year of elementary school; Corbin is a confident third grader; Bowen is making his move up to first grade; and Rex is off to preschool at last! As we have been talking about school starting and looking forward to this momentous day for the Martin family, I was sure it would all feel like a wonderful world of possibilities and freedom. Now that the day has come and all of my little ones are off expanding their minds, I admit my emotions are mixed! Change can be hard sometimes. It is very quiet here today!
The choice to stay home with my kids was an easy one to make, though financially it has been a stretch at times. As all you moms know, there is no job more rewarding, or more difficult than wrangling your kids all day long while trying to manage a household at the same time! Now I am moving to the next phase I suppose, still the stay at home mom, just shifting her focus a bit. People keep asking me what I will do all day. My response, "Whatever I want!" (-; Of course that is with tongue in cheek as there is still laundry to do, errands to run, volunteering at school, and not to mention the continued effort working on my masters degree. I guess the overriding feeling I have today at this crossroads is one of gratitude. I am so lucky to have four wonderful sons, a fantastic husband that I love more than ever, the gospel of Jesus Christ, a beautiful home, a supportive extended family, opportunities galore, the list could go on and on. To all of you, my family, my loved ones, as I had a spare moment to reflect in the quiet here at my house today, I am thankful for all of you!
The choice to stay home with my kids was an easy one to make, though financially it has been a stretch at times. As all you moms know, there is no job more rewarding, or more difficult than wrangling your kids all day long while trying to manage a household at the same time! Now I am moving to the next phase I suppose, still the stay at home mom, just shifting her focus a bit. People keep asking me what I will do all day. My response, "Whatever I want!" (-; Of course that is with tongue in cheek as there is still laundry to do, errands to run, volunteering at school, and not to mention the continued effort working on my masters degree. I guess the overriding feeling I have today at this crossroads is one of gratitude. I am so lucky to have four wonderful sons, a fantastic husband that I love more than ever, the gospel of Jesus Christ, a beautiful home, a supportive extended family, opportunities galore, the list could go on and on. To all of you, my family, my loved ones, as I had a spare moment to reflect in the quiet here at my house today, I am thankful for all of you!
Monday, August 13, 2007
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Still moving in! What we are learning
We have been in S. Jordan officially for 6 weeks and I am not completely unpacked. I have several good reasons, the first being that my closets and cupboards in the basement aren't finished yet, however, the shelves are almost complete then that excuse will be gone soon. Another good reason is that I don't have 6 extra bodies to organize and have somewhere or wanting to know where something is that they can't find to keep me moving. Next, my quilting machine is finally up and running and I don't have time to get to the boxes. We are so busy sitting around chatting that I just don't get things finished. With no deadlines, it takes me forever to finish a task. I have spent time wandering the streets in the area to locate good shopping places so that when visitors come, I will know the best places to take them for the items they want. My favorite store is still Material Girls, too bad they don't offer stock options. We are Home Depot's best customers. They see us at least once a day. Some of my time will be taken up with visiting teaching now that I have a partner (an ex RS pres) and 2 people to visit.
We are keeping the Hannays busy with laying tile, carrying things to the basement, hanging doors, doing moldings, etc., Kim is especially good at tiling and moldings, and I am willing to rent her out to those interested. We have learned not to attend the temple on ward temple night as the sessions are too crowded. We were the only ward member in the session because the rest of the ward was doing sealing! We have learned not to move into a ward where one of your children reside. The members know way too much about you.
We still have no living room furniture so guests have to sit on folding chairs while dad sits in his comfy recliner. By the 20th we will have a working toilet and the sinks hooked up in the bathroom, still no shower, that is our Sept project. Dad is getting most of his stuff into his workroom slowly but surely. He gets waylaid with tasks like painting, installing doors, putting in shelves, etc. We may be organized by Thanksgiving when all of you are invited to our house for dinner. It always helps to have a deadline to work toward to get something accomplished. Please RSVP.
Love,
Mom
We are keeping the Hannays busy with laying tile, carrying things to the basement, hanging doors, doing moldings, etc., Kim is especially good at tiling and moldings, and I am willing to rent her out to those interested. We have learned not to attend the temple on ward temple night as the sessions are too crowded. We were the only ward member in the session because the rest of the ward was doing sealing! We have learned not to move into a ward where one of your children reside. The members know way too much about you.
We still have no living room furniture so guests have to sit on folding chairs while dad sits in his comfy recliner. By the 20th we will have a working toilet and the sinks hooked up in the bathroom, still no shower, that is our Sept project. Dad is getting most of his stuff into his workroom slowly but surely. He gets waylaid with tasks like painting, installing doors, putting in shelves, etc. We may be organized by Thanksgiving when all of you are invited to our house for dinner. It always helps to have a deadline to work toward to get something accomplished. Please RSVP.
Love,
Mom
Friday, August 10, 2007
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Multitasking has it's risks
OK I just want you to know I do know the difference between the homonyms hole and whole. Unfortunately my mind cannot operate properly with three boys talking to me and one baby whining at me. Any tips on dealing with this problem would be greatly appreciated. Laurene
Big Whole
Sam said I missed this important picture, he dug ,and dug, and dug, and dug. It was up to his shoulders, to bad Theo could have used him to dig his foundation or maybe a job with John.
Laurene
Fun in the Sun
We had fun at the beach and visiting a light house. Skip had a close encounter with some dolphins. The boys played in the surf and the sand. I got to boggie board, sorry no pictures of my narly wipeouts. Claire is our bravest she was ready to run into the surf at anytime. we have to watch her like a hawk. Miss you all! Laurene
Saturday, August 04, 2007
Our summer is always jam packed with lots of birthdays and travel and fun. This July we had an extra special occasion in our family as Corbin turned 8 and was baptized! He has been looking forward to this birthday ever since Drake turned 8 two years ago. He was so ready to make this decision, and we are so proud of him! We are especially thankful to mom and dad and the Gilleland family for coming to Page to support Corbin! While they were here, Drake, Gabe, Seth, and Corbin participated in the Pioneer Day 5K. They did great! We also had a great time going to the lake on the Gillelands new boat! We are so blessed to have such an awesome family. Thanks so much for eveything!
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